Talking with Elemental #20 · Self-esteem

What this video is about

In this episode of Talking with Elemental, Alberto talks with psychologists Lidia and Marina about self-esteem, a concept very present on social media and in popular psychology. They argue that it is not just about loving yourself: they describe it as the result of self-knowledge and as a way of functioning that includes respecting yourself, accepting yourself and treating yourself with compassion. They also question the idea of high or low self-esteem, as they believe it cannot be measured and varies from day to day.

The conversation distinguishes self-compassion from the self-aggrandisement of affirmations repeated in front of the mirror, and advocates honesty with oneself as a way of detecting self-deception without falling into complacency or beating oneself up. They also apply this to their work as therapists, accepting that some sessions go better than others. They point out that self-knowledge comes both from observing oneself and from acting and engaging with the world, and warn of the risks of excessive introspection.

Finally, they talk about the effect of likes and social media, cultural differences in how self-esteem is understood and the importance of other people and a sense of belonging. They close with the need not to pathologise and to understand problems as multifactorial.

Topics: self-esteem, self-knowledge, self-compassion, social media, popular psychology